Without a doubt all women seek to feel more sexually empowered at different stages in their lives. For some of us, sexual confidence comes naturally, for others, it doesn’t flow as easily. Either way is perfectly normal and there’s definitely no ‘rights and wrongs’ when it comes to sexuality and sexual confidence. The good news is that if you’re feeling a little disempowered, sexual empowerment can be learnt.
Here’s five habits that I practice on a daily basis that I feel contribute to my own sexual empowerment. Feel free to incorporate any or all of them into your daily life if they resonate with you.
#1 A hot bath
Every single day I enjoy a hot bath. I add essential oils and coconut oil to the water and I soak in it for as long as I can. I feel like this daily habit contributes to my empowerment because it gives me time to appreciate doing absolutely nothing … naked. I enjoy the feeling of the hot water on my skin, the scent of the oils, and the fact I’m softening my body with coconut oil. I couldn’t survive without my daily bath ritual. If you have a lover, this can be a beautiful opportunity to do absolutely nothing together and connect at the end of the day.
#2 Spend time every day naked, including sleeping naked
Now for some of us this comes naturally, and for others the thought of being naked is a scary one. If nudity comes naturally to you then perfect, go for it and step it up by jumping outside of your comfort zone and getting naked where you usually don’t (like gardening naked, or hanging the washing out naked).
For those reading this who are cringing at the thought of gardening naked, be gentle with yourself and simply begin spending a little time each morning after your shower without getting into your clothes straight away. Baby steps.
Personally, this is one of my favourite habits … I believe that when we feel comfortable in our own skin, and comfortable going about our day-to-day routine without clothes on, then we eventually feel more comfortable sexually. I also highly recommend sleeping naked on a regular basis (like, every night).
#3 Meditate, in your own unique way
A sexually empowered woman is a woman who is comfortable in silence and able to be deeply present with herself. Meditation is a beautiful way to start the day and practice presence with yourself. And if traditional meditation isn’t your thing, that’s ok (and I completely understand!). Some days I sit and meditate with mantras playing, other days my meditation is dancing, other days it’s singing. It doesn’t matter if you’re not sitting looking like a buddhist monk, what matters is that you are taking time out to listen to your body’s wisdom, and to what your heart has to tell you. Simply being with yourself is super empowering.
Learn more about daily meditation rituals in my Ecstatic Sex & Deep Intimacy eBook and workbook.
#4 Eat healthy and exercise
I know, it sounds so damn simple, right?! Wrong! So many women don’t prioritise their health, and then wonder why they don’t feel sexually empowered! Feeding our body fresh food is absolutely essential if we want to feel sexually empowered! When we eat well, our body functions at full capacity, and our energy levels are at their best … which leads to higher libido and generally a greater zest for intimacy and sex.
Exercise gives us an opportunity to feel fit and confident in our own skin. And when we feel fabulous - both physically and mentally - this gives us more of a reason to feel more sexually empowered.
And if you do eat well and exercise regularly, but you still feel sexually unconfident, never fear. Many of us have deep shame and guilt surrounding our sexuality and often all it takes is some coaching or therapy and we are able to let go of what’s holding us back from feeling deeply empowered.
Self pleasure is a beautiful sacred way to connect with ourselves. To explore our body and know that we are able to pleasure ourself is beautiful. Often though the thought of self-pleasure as a daily habit can be tiring (“What if I’m not in the mood?!”). So, I encourage you to think outside the box with your definition of self-pleasure. For example, perhaps self-pleasure can simply be putting your hand on your pussy and your heart and sending yourself love. Or massaging your breasts before a shower. Or lying in bed and massaging your whole body with coconut oil. Self-pleasure doesn’t have to lead to orgasm, self-pleasure includes anything that you consider conscious, loving connection with yourself and your body.