It’s not always easy to feel authentically sexy and comfortable in our own skin, especially when it comes to sex and intimacy. ‘Stuff’ seems to get in the way of our natural ability to feel and radiate sexiness. We are created to be sexy and yet somehow, over the years, we are hit with some hard knocks; break-ups, heartbreak, awkward sexual experiences, death of loved ones… the list goes on. Life is often challenging but it’s up to us to pick ourselves up and reclaim our right to embrace our bodies and our desire for sexy, hot sex.
Which brings me to my 5 Simple Ways To Love The Skin You’re In and Feel Sexy Everyday:
1. Redefine ‘Sexy’
What does sexy mean for you? Is it about measurements and physical appearance? Or does it encompass more than that? We live in a world that allows mainstream media to saturate us with images of what sexy is supposed to be, instead of encouraging us to consider that everyone is sexy in their own unique way. Sexy can be as simple as feeling confident, present, healthy and radiant. When do you feel your sexiest?
2. Spend More Time Alone, Naked
You heard right - take off your clothes, settle in for the night and embrace your true nature and naked body. Take time out to look at your body and tell yourself what you love about it. This won’t always be easy, but if you work hard on truly loving the skin you’re in, then you’re well on your way to plenty of pleasure and satisfaction with your sexual partners.
3. Touch Yourself
Indulge in a hot shower or bath and take time out to massage your body with coconut oil or your favourite moisturiser. There’s nothing like a bit of self-loving to get the juices flowing. Once you’re comfortable touching your own body, invite your lover to watch and participate in the touching. The practice of self-pleasure can lead to all sorts of sexy and pleasurable situations; don’t underestimate how sexy you can feel when touching and pleasuring your own body!
4. Ask For What You Want
Never be afraid to ask for what you want, and I mean what you really want. This skill can apply to a lot of things in life, but when it comes to sex and pleasure there is nothing sexier than a lover who knows what they want, and asks for it. Don’t water your desires down, own them and be bold in asking for them!
5. Tap Into Your Inner Confidence and Fake It ‘Til You Make It!
Be bold and embrace a confident and sexy persona and you will be well on your way to being a confident and sexy person. Easier said than done, right? I agree: sometimes it’s hard to convince yourself of just how sexy you can be. But keep it simple and start with the little things; change your posture, tell yourself that you are sexy, write yourself a note on your bathroom mirror, ditch your granny undies and only wear sexy underwear all the time! Get into the habit of positive self-affirmation. You’ll be surprised at how easy it is to convince yourself and soon you’ll become that sexy and confident person that you’ve always wanted to be.
This article was published on my Sexology Column at www.ansellcondoms.com.au