It seems we are all getting a little caught up in the daily grind and forgetting the importance of regular, healthy, pleasurable sex. Life is becoming more and more busy and feeling dissatisfied with sex is a common complaint amongst many. Whether you’re single or in a relationship, increasing your sexual happiness will do wonders for your overall physical and mental health and wellbeing. With this in mind, I have come up with 3 simple steps that give you a chance to boost your sexual happiness today:
1. Stop The Glorification of Busy
Being too ‘busy’ is not cool. Being busy means you are saying yes to too many things and not prioritising what’s important (which is this case, is your sexual happiness). Too busy for sex? Too tired? Putting your sexual happiness at the bottom of the to-do list? STOP. You need to put your sexual pleasure first. This may mean setting up a regular date night with your lover. Or setting aside time each week for self-pleasure. It may mean that it’s time to bite the bullet and sign up to Tinder. Whatever floats your boat, just so long as you stop using the ‘busy’ excuse and start prioritising your schedule around sex and intimacy.
2. Look After Your Basic Physical and Mental Health
The truth is that if you don’t feel happy (both physically and mentally) then you are less likely to be enjoying lots of quality sex. Start feeding your body healthy food, begin regular exercise, take time out to make yourself feel good about who you are as a person. This may be daunting for some (again, the use of the word ‘busy’ may be a common excuse as to why you’re not already doing this) as self-care is rarely taught in school, or prioritised in the work place. The fact is that if your body and mind are healthy, your sexual appetite will increase and your desire to feel and experience pleasure will come naturally (pardon the pun).
3. Put Away Your Phone
I am so sick and tired of repeatedly telling couples that if they simply put their phone away (and turn their attention toward each other) then they may notice they actually want to enjoy intimacy and sex again. We live in a day and age that gives us access to absolutely everything on our mobile device - checking emails, scrolling through Instagram, stalking others lives on Facebook…the list goes on. I challenge you to ban phones from the bedroom (at least for the next 7 days). Stop checking out what everyone else is doing online and start focussing on your relationship with your lover and yourself. You’ll be surprised at how much time that gives you to enjoy more sex and/or masturbation.
This article was published in Juliet's regular Saturday column in the Gold Coast Bulletin 14th March 2015