May is masturbation month. That’s right, somebody out there decided that masturbation deserves a whole month of celebration…and I agree. Self-pleasure is a normal and natural part of life. We often begin touching our genitals at a very young age and associating that touch with pleasure and joy. Pleasurable touch continues into adulthood and is a fantastic way to explore your body and get to know what turns you on.
On the flip side, there is still a lot of shame and guilt surrounding the topic of masturbation - I personally believe this stems from old-school religious beliefs that continue to preach that self-pleasure is evil. If you feel like you may be harbouring shame and guilt when engaging in self-pleasure, it may be time to chat to a sexuality coach or therapist in order to let go of those feelings and begin to embrace masturbation as normal, natural and fun.
Never put masturbation at the top of your priority list? Never fear, here are 3 tips for better self-pleasure:
Relax. We live in a busy world and if you’re like the rest of us, you’re flat out getting naked, never mind getting busy with masturbation. Set aside some time for YOU. Put away your phone, shut the front door, take a deep breath and make self-pleasure a relaxing and peaceful experience.
Enjoy massage. Taking time to give yourself a massage is the first step to getting to know your body. Grab some organic coconut oil and rub it on your skin. If you’re feeling daring, take things south and enjoy a slow genital massage. Get to know what feels good and don’t rush. There’s nothing more attractive than someone who takes time out to look after, and get to know, their own body.
Let go of pressure. We are often lead to believe that self-pleasure has to end in orgasm. The truth is that many woman find it a challenge to reach orgasm and then feel disappointed when it doesn’t happen. Let go of orgasm expectations! Enjoy spending time alone and do what feels right for you…you may not reach orgasm every time and that’s ok. What’s important is that you are taking time out to look after yourself.
This article was published in Juliet's regular Saturday column in the Gold Coast Bulletin 16th May 2015