The biggest complaint I hear people say is that they’re not having enough sex with their long-term partner. Unfortunately, I don’t have the magic solution to this very real problem. Reality is, most couples seem to face the challenge at some stage or another during their relationship and, if one or both partners aren’t happy, it can lead to a relationship breakdown.
So how do we keep the passion alive in our long-term relationship? Unfortunately, I don’t have a magic wand that will ease your troubles in this area, but I do have two simple tips that may help:
Enjoy simple intimacy
Get back to basics. When people have been in a relationship for a while, they seem to take each other for granted. Simple pleasures like kissing and holding hands are soon forgotten, and before long people feel more like best friends than lovers. Taking things back to basics means taking time out to kiss your partner often (I’m talking a passionate kiss, not just a peck on the lips), holding their hand whilst waiting in queue to order a morning coffee, and organising date night even when it seems easier to grab takeaway and head to bed. It takes two to tango, so both parties need to make the extra special effort if the sex and desire is to one day return.
Seek Couples Therapy
This is the best thing you can do for your relationship if you want it to stay together. Many couples see a therapist together for a variety of reasons, but when the sex is lacking, therapy is a great solution. Find a couples therapist that you are both comfortable with and stick to it for a couple of months at least. Relationships are hard work! Therapy assists you in sorting out your differences and creates a space where both parties can safely communicate how they feel about the challenges they are facing.