Over the past few months I have supercharged my manifesting skills in life by exploring and creating with sex magic. Sex magic, put simply, is using the power of our sexual and orgasmic energy to manifest exactly what we want in life. Sex magic can be practiced anytime, anywhere. When we allow ourselves to tap into the power of manifesting during self-pleasure, or love-making with a lover/beloved, we are tapping into the power of our life force energy and creating from a space of pure consciousness and love.
It seems there are a lot of myths surrounding the topic of anal sex; it’s painful, men want it more than us women, women who love it are dirty. The list goes on and on, which leads to a misconception that the only people who love it are men having sex with men, and this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Anal sex is still somewhat of a taboo topic in mainstream conversation and, as far as I’m concerned, it’s not talked about enough. Which brings me to 5 anal sex myths (de-bunked):
Is Tantric sex a ‘thing’ for women who have sex with women? How can we have deeper intimacy and ecstatic sex on a regular basis? My sex life with my woman is stale, how can I bring back the excitement? Every week I get questions from women who have sex with women about how they can experience better, more connected sex (on a regular basis). I myself have explored the world of Tantra with a female lover, and so I’m here to impart some secrets I’ve learnt along the way about Tantric lesbian sex.
A rose quartz crystal dildo in my pussy, WTF? Yep, that’s what I thought when I first heard of crystal dildos, so I get it if you’re thinking this is yet another airy fairy hippy gimmick. Luckily, it’s not. In fact ever since using my first rose quartz Chakrubs dildo a few months ago, I’ve never looked back. So, what’s the big deal? Why am I pushing crystal dildos all-of-a-sudden? Well, let me enlighten you with a few simple facts about sex toys and vaginas.
We all want to be enjoying ecstatic, orgasmic sex every day, right? “Yes!”, I hear you yell. Over the past few years I’ve written 100’s of blog posts about sex, and today I’ve picked my top 30 and put them all in the one place for your sensual reading pleasure.
Let’s be honest, some women just do not enjoy giving blow jobs, full stop. And you know what, that’s ok, because worshipping co*k isn’t every woman’s cup of tea, so to speak. But then there’s the women who think they don’t enjoy it, but actually just don’t really know what to do … and so they’re not feeling confident with their blow job skills. Dear women who don’t love giving blow jobs, this article is for you.
This year I pushed my boundaries in all ways possible; I surrounded myself with powerful, inspiring leaders in the area of sexuality & Tantra, I attended a myriad of workshops and events so that I could expand myself both personally and professionally, and I feel I truly experienced ecstasy and pleasure like never before. There were extreme highs, and there were extreme lows. There was extreme pain, and extreme pleasure. All-in-all I believe this year has been by far one of the best in my life (and that’s a BIG call, ‘cos my life has been pretty damn good).
Mutual masturbation is when two (or more) people masturbate in each other’s presence. Perhaps you are both positioned on opposite sides of the room, or you’re alongside each other kissing, or you’re on opposite sides of the world, watching and listening via a screen. It doesn’t matter how you choose to do it, what matters is that you experience and embrace mutual masturbation as a regular practice with your lover/s.
For those of you who have never experienced eye-fucking with a stranger, it goes a little something like this: firstly, you and your eye-fucking partner instantly feel that ‘something’ that draws you to each other … it’s like a magnetic sexual cosmic pull that’s intense from the moment you meet. The sexual chemistry is unashamedly there in all it’s glory and the energy between you both is like a bomb exploding inside your mind and body. Oh, and I refer to the connection as ‘cosmic’, because often it’s not always just your sex centre speaking, it’s your heart and your consciousness saying a ‘holy f*ck yes, yes, yes’ to that person.
Many clients come to me and report that sex is boring … it’s quick and very orgasm focussed and there’s something missing. Often my clients can’t pinpoint what is missing, but they know that there must be more to sex than what they’re experiencing. That something is the connection and intimacy that they unconsciously desire with their partner/lover and they don't know it's missing because they've never experienced it before.
Lately I’ve been feeling like less sex and intimacy than usual, which bothers me. What bothers me more is that instead of taking ownership of my low libido, I realised I’ve been blaming my partner and playing the victim. Victim mentality is dangerous - victim mentality is when a person tends to regard him or herself as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave like it were the case—even in the absence of clear evidence.
Many women (and men) have no clue how to navigate their way around the clitoris, which ultimately leads to sex being less than satisfying and creates much confusion in the boudoir. I admit that I had no clue where my clitoris was until my early 20’s…I knew that something down there felt God damn great, but I wasn’t aware that it was called a clitoris. So with this in mind, here are 5 must-know facts about the clitoris that I encourage you to share with your daughters, friends and the world:
I’ve always been a huge fan of the Quick F*ck. But hey, when you don’t have nobody to f*ck, or you simply can’t be assed engaging with another human being, then a quick masturbation session always seems to hit the spot.
I’m a big fan of self-pleasure; I was fortunate enough to discover my ‘pleasure spot’ at a young age and haven’t looked back since. I feel truly blessed that masturbation feels natural and that making myself cum has always been relatively easy.
Over the years though, I have discovered many women who have had a rough trot with masturbation; stories of shame and guilt (often somewhat associated with religion, surprise surprise), of the inability to reach orgasm through self-pleasure and women who just don’t feel the desire to pleasure themselves at all. All of the above feelings are completely normal and, if they resonate with you, believe me; you are not alone.
On the top of my new year goals list is ‘read more’…so I’ve done some research and chosen five books about hot sex and healthy relationships that I’m going to tick off my reading list in the first half of 2016.
It’s January 1st, and I’m feeling adventurous. On my list of goals for 2016 I have written in bold: ‘Explore My Sexuality Even More’ . Naturally as a Sexologist it’s assumed that I’ve tried and tested almost everything… but the truth is there is always room for new experiences and growth and I truly believe that exploring my sexuality will be a life-long adventure.
So in the spirit of fun and ‘sex education’, I’m adding five new sexual adventures to my own bucket-list in 2016. No, I’m not going to share my personal sexual goals, ‘cos my sex life is mine, and I’m keeping it that way. However for your own pleasure, I have listed five new ideas that you may like to add to your own list. Perhaps you’ve already ticked these off, or you have other ideas that float your boat…either way enjoy 2016 and remember that owning your sexuality and sexual power is God damn sexy.
Many people assume that great sex should magically arrive on our doorstep (think knight-in-shining-armour/fairytale princess ready to jump into bed with us for hours)…but it doesn’t always turn out that way. In fact, most sexual relationships take a while to warm up and require time and presence if they are going to be pleasurable for BOTH parties. Getting to know your partner’s body, sexual responses, emotions and likes/dislikes is an art form…and one worth pursuing.
It’s 2015 and women are faking orgasms left, right and centre. Personally I believe faking an orgasm is ripping myself off, which is why I choose not to do it. I’d rather not have an orgasm at all, than fake it with my partner. But not every woman is the same, in fact many women I speak to say they feel dissatisfied sexually and would rather ‘get it over and done with’. When this scenario plays out, their lovers assume their partner is sexually satisfied, and therefor don’t see the need to go the extra mile.
It’s easy to get caught up in the common myths that circulate in society about sex. As taboo as the topic is, it seems people love gossiping about the ‘rights and wrongs’ and the ins and outs (pardon the pun) of sex and relationships. Today, I’m here to debunk my top 3 myths and clear up the little lies that we seem to tell ourselves about what should be a normal, natural and healthy part of life.
Every woman is different when it comes to their experience of sexual pleasure and their unique orgasmic pattern. Some women (aka the lucky ones) can reach orgasm at the drop of a hat, others take time and need to feel emotionally safe to reach orgasm, and many women haven’t experienced the ‘big O’ at all. Wherever you’re at (or your partner is at) with your ability to orgasm, is absolutely perfect for you. If you’ve never had an orgasm before, never fear, with a little education and patience, your time will come (pardon the pun).
At some stage in our lives we will all encounter a sex life that seems to have taken a turn for the worse. Long term relationships always go through their ups and downs and, more often than not, couples find themselves bored and uninspired by their sex life. It’s time to shake things up and add some spice to your life! Here are 5 realistic ways that you can spice up your sex life today:
What the hell is a sexologist? Are you serious, does such a career even exist? How did you become a sexologist? I get asked all these questions, and more, on a weekly basis. With this in mind, it’s about time I write about a day in the life of me; a full-time sexologist, writer, mother and lover.
Talking about sex is still somewhat ‘taboo’ and it’s not surprising that there are plenty of false myths that surround the topic of sex and intimacy. As a sexologist I am regularly busting these myths with my clients and helping people let go of limiting belief systems and ways of being. Doing so allows people to move forward and enjoy sex (without all the shame, guilt and misunderstanding that once was). With this in mind, it’s time to publicly debunk some of the common myths that surround the topic of sex in our culture.
Leave her panting, soaking between the legs, trembling and quivering. Make her leg-less and alive because, guess what? Women don't feel the need to go to sleep after orgasm. In fact, women are often ready to go again, and again, and again, and again…
These days it’s easy to get caught up in the daily-grind called ‘life’ and before we know it, self-love and pleasure seem to be placed on the back burner. Before long we begin to feel frustrated and annoyed (often blaming our lovers) for the lack of pleasure and satisfaction we feel in our everyday life. With this in mind, here are 3 tips for better self-loving:
Holistic sex education in Australian schools is scarce. If education does take place, it’s limited to the bare essentials - how to put a condom on a banana, alongside various scare tactics surrounding the contraction of STI’S, HIV and unplanned pregnancy. In no way am I suggesting that the aforementioned topics are not important, (because they are) but what about all the other stuff?
These days it’s easy to get caught up in the ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ of orgasm and pleasure. There is so much advice flying about on the internet that both women and men are often left wondering how the hell they can best please themselves and their partners. Female orgasm in particular is portrayed as a mysterious and personal experience and there are definitely some common orgasm myths that need to be debunked.
The orgasm gap is a concept among sex researchers that explains the unequal distribution of orgasms between women and men. According to a recent American survey, men experience orgasm up to three times more often than women. When stats like these hit the media there’s always a lot of discussion about how to close the orgasm gap. But what if the gap doesn’t need to be ‘closed’? What if we accept that the orgasmic patterns of women and men shouldn’t be compared? All genders experience pleasure in different and unique ways and for a lot of people, orgasm isn’t always a necessary ingredient for great sex.