As women, when we allow ourselves to be penetrated by another, we open our pussy and womb space (and quite possibly mouth and ass) up to the consciousness of our chosen lover. We take them into us physically and, we take them into us energetically. We absorb their consciousness into our entire being. Often when this happens we open ourselves up to all sorts of emotions and feelings that impact us on a deep level in both positive and negative ways.
Women, what's your relationship like with your cycle and your menstrual blood? How in tune with your body are you at the different stages of your cycle throughout the month? What do you do to honour your body during the time that you bleed? I'm asking these questions, because I wish someone had asked them of me years ago. You see, for years, I was that woman who 'pushed through' my period; I numbed my cramps with pain killers, plugged myself with tampons and kept working and exercising like a mad woman.
She is a woman, who, through ritual or psychological development, has come to know the spiritual side of her sexuality, her true eroticism, and lives this out according to her individual circumstances. The Sacred Slut resides within us all, both women and men - she’s not ashamed of her sexuality, she embraces it all and owns that part of herself.
What is ‘lesbian sex’? How do two women even have sex? I get these questions a fair bit and I actually get why it’s misunderstood; sex between two women isn’t spoken about enough, nor are we educated as children about it … so it’s no surprise that it’s a little tricky to understand. So today I’m here to impart some of my professional and personal knowledge and hot tips with you about beginners lesbian sex. This article is aimed for women who are curious, or wanting to have sex with women but don’t know where to begin.
Without a doubt all women seek to feel more sexually empowered at different stages in their lives. For some of us, sexual confidence comes naturally, for others, it doesn’t flow as easily. Either way is perfectly normal and there’s definitely no ‘rights and wrongs’ when it comes to sexuality and sexual confidence. The good news is that if you’re feeling a little disempowered, sexual empowerment can be learnt.
We all want to be enjoying ecstatic, orgasmic sex every day, right? “Yes!”, I hear you yell. Over the past few years I’ve written 100’s of blog posts about sex, and today I’ve picked my top 30 and put them all in the one place for your sensual reading pleasure.
Being a Sexually Empowered Human means fully embracing your sexuality, your sex centre and your desire for life-changing sex. It means fully owning your deep yearning for connection, intimacy and wild fucking. You don’t feel the need to ‘dress’ sexy, because your sexiness isn’t reliant on what you wear, or what clothing size you are … you are sexy from the moment you wake up in your most raw and natural essence and way of being and moving in your body and spirit.
This year I pushed my boundaries in all ways possible; I surrounded myself with powerful, inspiring leaders in the area of sexuality & Tantra, I attended a myriad of workshops and events so that I could expand myself both personally and professionally, and I feel I truly experienced ecstasy and pleasure like never before. There were extreme highs, and there were extreme lows. There was extreme pain, and extreme pleasure. All-in-all I believe this year has been by far one of the best in my life (and that’s a BIG call, ‘cos my life has been pretty damn good).
Ladies, it’s time to honour our vagina’s and treat them like the divine and exquisite temple that they are, allowing only amazing energy and love to enter our sacred space. All too often we as a women don’t give our pussy the love that it needs and deserves. When we neglect our pussy it overflows into us not enjoying our sexuality in it’s fullness, and we definitely don’t reap the full benefits and pleasure of sex and love-making with others.
So, are you bisexual? Or are you more heterosexual than bisexual? Or what about that time you ‘turned lesbian?’, is that phase over now?
On a weekly basis I’m asked different versions of the above questions about my sexuality. And rightly so, people are naturally curious about sexuality and love to use labels to define human beings, thus placing us in boxes so that we can better understand each other. But what if labels were taken out of the equation, and we began to identify with being purely sexual?
We live in a culture that represses sexuality and teaches us that it’s not okay to be crazy, sexual, expressive beings. We live in a culture that teaches us to be quieter, calmer, politer, more contained … from a young age we are told to ‘act like a lady/gentleman’ and ‘keep your thoughts to yourself’. What a repressed f*cked up way to live!
Women On Top is an interview series that features everyday women from around the globe and asks them straight-to-the-point questions about their sexuality. Women On Top aims to inspire and grow a community of women who learn and grow from each other's sexual stories and wisdom. This week I interviewed Georgia about monogamy and open relationships, sexual fluidity, her futile pursuit of the fairytale romance, and dropping her inhibitions in the boudoir.
Why is it that people are hung up on the LGBTIQ labels? My belief is that labels box us into categories… which in turn gives the people around us some sort of understanding about who we are and where we ‘fit’ in. I don’t like the concept of labels, my wish is that we respect each other as humans and our sexuality doesn’t have to come into the equation if we are anything other than ‘straight’. But hey, labels are a huge part of our world, so what does that mean if we don’t seem to fit into any specific LGBTIQ category?
Women On Top is an interview series that features everyday women from around the globe and asks them straight-to-the-point questions about their sexuality. Women On Top aims to inspire and grow a community of women who learn and grow from each other's sexual stories and wisdom. This week I interviewed Lauren about sexuality as sacred dance, seeing vulnerability as power, self-pleasure, and exploring sex with other women.
Firstly, I believe we need to be honest and open with our children. This means no silly stories about ‘stalks’ bringing babies, and no ignoring the fact that your children are being exposed to sex via media and porn from a very young age. If you feel uncomfortable talking about sex to your children, this is a sign that you yourself need to work on your own ‘stuff’ that prevents you from being able to talk to your own children about it. Go see a therapist, read about sex, educate yourself, and deal with any past trauma that’s preventing you from being comfortable with the topic.
What I’ve discovered about me over the past few months is that I’ve been really great at being the ‘strong’ woman. From a very young age I remember being proud of the fact that I was ‘independent’. This got me through my parent’s divorce, allowed me to travel the world alone at age 17, carried me through the break down of my relationship with my daughter’s father, and then got me through the ongoing homophobia I experienced when I came out as Bisexual and entered into a relationship with a woman.
Women On Top is an interview series that features everyday women from around the globe and asks them straight-to-the-point questions about their sexuality. Women On Top aims to inspire and grow a community of women who learn and grow from each other's sexual stories and wisdom. This week I spoke to Lia-Belle about her struggle with body image, what inspires her to make love, her relationship with her wife, clean white sheets and her amazing reoccurring sexual fantasy.
Women On Top is an interview series that features everyday women from around the globe and asks them straight-to-the-point questions about their sexuality. Women On Top aims to inspire and grow a community of women who learn and grow from each other's sexual stories and wisdom. I interviewed Alexa about self-pleasure, the women in her life who inspire her sexually and her sexual reiki fantasy.
Lately I’ve been feeling like less sex and intimacy than usual, which bothers me. What bothers me more is that instead of taking ownership of my low libido, I realised I’ve been blaming my partner and playing the victim. Victim mentality is dangerous - victim mentality is when a person tends to regard him or herself as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave like it were the case—even in the absence of clear evidence.
Women On Top is an interview series that features everyday women from around the globe and asks them straight-to-the-point questions about their sexuality. Women On Top aims to inspire and grow a community of women who learn and grow from each other's sexual stories and wisdom. I interviewed Chelsea about entering womanhood, sex dreams & masturbation.
I’ve been in a committed relationship with my beautiful fiancé for 4 years. When we met and began dating I never expected us to one-day be engaged to marry…and yet here I am, planning a lifetime together with another woman.
From the outside, our relationship appears to be a magical gay fairytale: two beautiful women fall in love and live happily-ever-after with daughter and dog. In reality, it’s not always that straight-forward, in fact our relationship goes through major ups and downs, just like any other couple.
I’m a big fan of self-pleasure; I was fortunate enough to discover my ‘pleasure spot’ at a young age and haven’t looked back since. I feel truly blessed that masturbation feels natural and that making myself cum has always been relatively easy.
Over the years though, I have discovered many women who have had a rough trot with masturbation; stories of shame and guilt (often somewhat associated with religion, surprise surprise), of the inability to reach orgasm through self-pleasure and women who just don’t feel the desire to pleasure themselves at all. All of the above feelings are completely normal and, if they resonate with you, believe me; you are not alone.
It’s January 1st, and I’m feeling adventurous. On my list of goals for 2016 I have written in bold: ‘Explore My Sexuality Even More’ . Naturally as a Sexologist it’s assumed that I’ve tried and tested almost everything… but the truth is there is always room for new experiences and growth and I truly believe that exploring my sexuality will be a life-long adventure.
So in the spirit of fun and ‘sex education’, I’m adding five new sexual adventures to my own bucket-list in 2016. No, I’m not going to share my personal sexual goals, ‘cos my sex life is mine, and I’m keeping it that way. However for your own pleasure, I have listed five new ideas that you may like to add to your own list. Perhaps you’ve already ticked these off, or you have other ideas that float your boat…either way enjoy 2016 and remember that owning your sexuality and sexual power is God damn sexy.
It’s that time of the year again; I’m sitting on my couch eating leftover Xmas chocolate whilst putting plans into place for the year to come. I truly believe that how I enter the New Year is how the year ahead will unfold, and so with this in mind I'm sharing my top NYE rituals with you upon entering 2016.
Sex is one of our biggest pleasures in life, and also one of our biggest pass times. Why then, does sex create so much confusion, heartbreak and misunderstanding between lovers? The fact is, women and men are completely different when it comes to sex and brain function.
Rule number one when it comes to sex: there is no normal. Sex is a big part of our lives and yet it’s still a very taboo topic of conversation in our society. As a result, we don’t talk about sex enough and the lack of sex-talk leads to assumptions being made about our sex lives; Are we having sex enough? Is what we do in the bedroom normal? Should we be having sex daily? Are our neighbours doing it more than us?
Let’s be honest, everyone at some stage has a secret sexual fantasy in the back of their mind (or their bedroom cupboard) that they are dying to share with their partner. Unfortunately, bringing up the topic of fantasy with a partner can be awkward, and often we end up keeping our sexual fantasies to ourselves. So how do we successfully go from fantasy, to reality? And what’s the best way to bring up the topic with our sexual partner?
As a sexologist a big part of my job is to spend time with amazing people who want to solve their sex challenges and feel empowered as sexual beings. Sexuality coaching is fast becoming popular globally and I believe it’s an essential ingredient if you’re seeking a healthy and pleasurable sex life.
So what the hell is sexuality coaching? Well, it’s about getting real with how you desire to feel and what you want to experience sexually. As a sexuality coach I give my clients tools that will empower them to move forward and create opportunities for growth and exploration. If you’re seeking more sex, and more fulfilling sex, then sexuality coaching is for you. I guess you can liken coaching to therapy, but coaching focuses on moving forward and getting what you want.
It’s not always easy to feel sexy everyday. ‘Life’ seems to get in the way and we are dealt with knock-downs; work stress, sleepless nights with kids, death of loved ones, relationship breakdowns, awkward sexual experiences… the list goes on. When life feels hard, feeling sexy doesn’t come naturally. Unfortunately though, the only person who can help you out of the unsexy rut is you.
It’s easy to get caught up in the common myths that circulate in society about sex. As taboo as the topic is, it seems people love gossiping about the ‘rights and wrongs’ and the ins and outs (pardon the pun) of sex and relationships. Today, I’m here to debunk my top 3 myths and clear up the little lies that we seem to tell ourselves about what should be a normal, natural and healthy part of life.